The Best 'Florida Man' Stories of 2020 So Far
Whether you live in the Sunshine State or not, chances are you’ve heard of the Florida Man. The Florida man is not a single individual, but a slew of news headlines that spark laughable internet stories. Read on for the best and most ridiculous headlines about “Florida Man” from 2020 so far!
Dr. Pepper Bandit
The first story is close to home here in Bay County, Florida. On the second day of the year, January 2, a Florida Man in Panama City crashed his car into a bar so he could steal a Dr. Pepper. When the police found him, he was indeed sitting and enjoying his Dr. Pepper. Adding insult to injury, the man also had a gun on his person, which turned the charge into an armed burglary.
Impersonating an Officer
The best part of this headline is the ‘Twice in 2 Days’. The headline reads, “Florida Man Arrested Twice in 2 Days For Impersonating a Police Officer”. You would think he would have enough common sense to wait a couple of days before committing the same crime again.
Put on Pants
“Florida Judge Begs Lawyers: Get Dressed For Zoom Hearings”. The fact that a judge had to actually write a statement about this publicly gets this headline on the list. We understand that everyone who is having to work from home during this pandemic has had some adjusting to do, but you would think lawyers would be low on the list to get reprimanded.
The Wig Didn’t Work
“Florida Man Donned Blonde Wig to Commit Burglary. It Didn’t Work, Deputies Say.” We have to give the criminal props for trying to mix things up, but a face mask is usually a burglar's best bet when trying to disguise your appearance.
Thong-Wearing FL Man
“Thong wearing Florida man arrested while building shed with garbage on stranger’s property.” We know it’s hot in Florida so we understand the scantily clad trespasser, but building a shed out of garbage? “He stated he was an artist that makes things from garbage,” the arrest report read.
Machete Face Tattoo
“Florida man with machete face tattoo accused of using a machete to attack Hernando Co. man”. According to deputies, Justin Couch, 25 attacked a man multiple times with a machete following an argument at a home in Hernando County. Do you think it was the face tattoo that gave him away?
Checks from Mom
“Florida man sentenced for collecting dead mom’s social security” - is just plain sinister. Investigators say he had cashed the checks for almost a full decade after his mother passed away. The total amount he stole was around $76,000 and he will spend 6 months in federal prison for the crime.
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